Thursday, March 27, 2014

Family Trip

I am packing us up to head out of town for spring break.  It has been a rough two weeks with Munchkin being sick and work being busy. oh and me having a broken wrist...makes typing kind of hard to do efficiently!  I honestly haven't had time to really plan or pack. 

I realized tonight as I was running through my lists in my head, that exactly six years ago to the day, the three of us were packing up and heading out of town for our first family weekend.  We were excited to be a family of three taking a trip for the first time.   If you are following me, you likely know that it didn't end well at all...(see here)

There are times where it still seems surreal everything that happened.  Then there are times where I feel like I am in a dream.  Like tonight, getting ready and realizing that I really am in this alone.  We are a family of two. 

I am having a hard time putting my feelings into words.   In ways it feels like the crash was eons ago and happened to someone else.  Some poor girl had her life shattered on the side of the road.  When I look at how far I have come, it really feels like it was someone other than me. 

I remember the broken feelings and I remember how much they hurt, and I take a breath and focus on my life now.   My life is not bad, in fact it is far better than I imagined that it would be.   There are parts of my heart that are still broken and shattered, but they are overshadowed by the parts of me that are grateful. 

So, as I approach the "angel-versary" as it is commonly called, I will focus on the positive and the grateful.  I will focus on the fact that I was loved well and that Munchkin was cherished by two parents even though I am the only one here.