Wednesday, October 3, 2012

New Show "Go On" Review

The premise of this is that it is a relatively young widow who lost his wife.   I saw the pilot episode after the Olympics, I wasn't really sure what to think about it. 

Honestly, it has grown on me.  The producers to a decent job of showing the ugly side of grief woven through life.   The end of one episode, he explodes throwing things at a car when someone is texting.  It then comes out in ugly form that his wife died in a car accident while replying to a text. 

This kind of outburst is extremely realistic.  I can remember doing it multiple times the first year or so.  It is exhausting. 

Another thing that sticks in my head was the whole tossing and turning in bed and finally getting up.  I can completely relate to this.   After being married for almost nine years, it took me over 4 years to remember how to sleep alone.   To be able to fall asleep, stay asleep and wake up to reality.  What do I mean by that?  Well for years, and sometimes still--I was haunted by flashbacks of the accident.  I would wake up screaming and re-experience the accident.   Living through it once apparently was not good enough for my brain...oh heck no...chronic overachiever here...let's just go and do it daily for over two years!   Well when that was done, I would have pleasant dreams...I would dream of us, our family our life.  Then I would slowly wake--far better then awakening in terror, except this time, I would wake slowly, in that in between state where your dreams still exist, where it seemed like the last few years were the nightmare and that everything was ok.  Until I opened my eyes, Until I fully awoke and realized that the nightmare was real and the dream was just that, a wish for the life we planned. 

Yelling and throwing stuff at a cemetary...BEEN THERE DONE THAT! Not really all that productive, but hey, I'm not going to hurt the feelings of anyone dead right?  Personally at the time, I thought I was being far more productive at yelling at a headstone than an actual real person in front of me with feelings.  Didn't quite occur to me that I may have looked a little crazy....although I probably did! There is a very odd dark humor that many widows have used to survive...and I think the show captures that decently well.

Oh and the giving away of stuff...he gave her sewing machine to someone who needed one, the group cautioned him that he may not want to do that...but he did, and he regretted it.  MAN does that hit home.  Somethings you just can't explain. 

Overall, I think the show does a decent job of intertwining realistic reactions to real situations that widows face every day.   Most things may be so subtle that the average person may not take notice, but I do.  I think the fact that I notice, makes me hope that someone who watches may see something and then see something in real life, and maybe just maybe may think.   HMMM....maybe this person is having a REALLY bad day....maybe they are not crazy after all!