Social media has a proliferation of "things to teach your son" post lately. Some of them have been good...some have been laughable. Many of the things, like teaching him to cook and clean and survive on his own, well honestly they go without saying.
I have spent many nights praying that I am enough, that I teach him enough. I worry and pray that raising him by myself won't result in horrific social consequences. I try very hard not to watch late night television that shows all of the ads for the ambulance chasers that convince the world that children without a father are destined to go to jail...
But I focus on what I want him to know.
That he is loved, more than he can ever imagine and won't know until he has a child of his own.
I want him to know that marriage is beautiful, and love is worth it. That his father loved me so much and so well.
That being a man isn't all about being crass, that he really should be a gentleman.
That having fun is great, but it should never be done at the expense of someone else.
That working hard is important and expected, in our family we do the best we can at all times.
I hope that in my singleness, I can still show him these things and more. That in spite of the fact that Robert is dead...these are still things he needs to learn and that I need to teach him.
I pray that I am enough.